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A PLACE TO VENT

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Baby fat. [Oct. 1st, 2010|11:53 pm]
A PLACE TO VENT

accept_yourself

[necr0tic]
I just had a baby, he's the love of my life,the reason I wake up each morning, and the one thing that keeps me going when things get tough. I'd love to say I couldnt be happier, but I'd be full of crap.

I thought I'd finally gotten past all my body issues.I thought I was comfortable enough with myself, but I guess I was wrong. I finally decided to have a baby because I finally felt good enough about myself to where I didnt think getting bigger would bother me but man oh man, I didnt figure in all the weight you put on while pregnant. I just ate and ate and ate for nine months... I was 125 lbs the day I found out I was pregnant and the day I had the baby I was like 192 ish... yeah.. huge.
I went to my 6 week appointment, and was pleased to know that I had gotten down to 158, but really I hate how my body looks right now. I keep telling myself that it's alright, that I just had a baby, that I'm allowed to look a little flumpy, but I really cant help but be disgusted by what I see in the mirror, and I'm starting to catch myself slipping back into my old ways of just not eating. I was always good at it, it seems like if I dont want to eat, I just dont get hungry- I'm really good at not eating, but honestly I feel guilty about it. I dont know.. I just had to vent. I feel pretty lost at the moment.
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Comments:
From: (Anonymous)
2014-09-18 12:16 am (UTC)

John

Yeah bookmaking this wasn't a risky conclusion outstanding post! fdkbedkedagafdbf
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[User Picture]From: necr0tic
2014-09-18 12:55 am (UTC)

Re: John

Happy update. I got smart realized the issue wasn't me... But my super controlling a-hole of a husband. I got on some anti-depressants for post partum depression and telling him it was over.... He ended up killing himself and my son and I have moved on to far better things.

I ended up married to my best friend from way back in Highschool...we had a baby in 2013.. This time I didn't gain nearly as much (because I'm no longer with someone that makes me miserable)... The weight I did gain I lost in 3 months with a healthy diet and exercise. Seriously it doesn't get better than this :D
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